So you may have an obsession for Asian women

[Candyman]

I figured that I would write a follow-up to the thread that I created on debunking the Asian fetish.

http://forum.scanlover.com/showthread.php?t=25525

I wanted to find out if there really was a fetish. The topic was also the reason why I started a blog so that I could get a difference of opinion, and there wasn't any because you can't have a fetish for women since by nature, you're going to be attracted to them. But people will still use the term fetish since they don't know the definition of the word, because they prefer using the term, or use it to put down your attraction to Asian women.

So yesterday, I started wondering if I don't have a fetish, then what do I have? To put it in its proper term, it's an obsession.

It started out as a simple attraction. I would take notice to them more than I would anyone else since they usually possess characteristics that I love, and then over the years it grew from there to the point where I am at today.

I think if I just had an attraction, then I wouldn't be on sites like here, Asian Sirens, etc. I wouldn't be discussing them or trying to photograph them and the like. So I have a healthy obsession for Asian women since I am also into other ethnicities of women.

What I don't have is an unhealthy obsession for Asian women. I would categorize those as being people who deem themselves as having yellow fever or into Asian women but couldn't tell you why, or because their obsession developed from a heavy obsession into Asian culture and based on silly stereotypes such as being submissive, and not from just being attracted to them. So my goal when I created the first thread was to not be lumped in with these people, because I hated feeling like I had some type of a problem because of who I'm attracted to, and since anyone else can go for who they are attracted to without being categorized as a fetishist such as White women who only go for Black guys. It's okay for them to have a preference but not me. Whatever.

So what say you?

[Abi]

This is a very good topic for discussion. Personally I believe people use words to refer to themselves and others without researching the definitions. I've asked a lot of people what they consider a fetish to be, and why they feel they're 'obsessed' with a subject or person. The result was usually the same, they misundertood the meanings of the terms they use.
As I've learned about sociology, it's safe to say the biggest issues within the realm is stereotyping. It's too easy for people to alllow themselves to fall into a habit of stereotyping. Generally they develop a conventional idea of the way somoene should be or the way a race shouldn't be for example. The problem is with every generation stereotyping becomes more widespread and at the same time more specific, such as 'white women who only go for black men'. In studying stereotypical labeling it's obvious that sexual attraction seemed to be the largest target, thus confusion and ignorance bleed through and terms aren't understood before slapping it to an individual.

It aggravates the fuck out of me that people see me as obsessed with cops or any specific police officer because I love the uniform.
I understand your aggravation with being labeled Candyman. What it boils down to is not giving a shit what other people think. Realize it's not for other's to decide who they think/believe you should be attracted to. It's not a problem you have, it's their problem for being close-minded and somewhat ignorant. An obsession, when healthy is so totally normal.
Something just dawned on me...and it's weirding me out [in a good way]. I know of 1 couple personally where I live..... a tall black man and a cute little asian woman....? [will check your location]

[decoy_2099]

i know where you are coming from it is real easy to naturaly go past the zone of fetish and it an obsession for me video games, porn and alcohol are my downfall. i can say i was accused of having an obsession for this one girl to the point of stalking but i never went past that, yes being obsesed over something is a normal thing, but can have bad turnouts i dont know how else to say it but dont let it run your life

[OldiesLover]

Hummm... Do you mean you have an OCD (?): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessi...lsive_disorder

As can be seen... Obsession is a mental disorder.


Also see: http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topic...cd/index.shtml

And: http://www.mentalhealth.com/dis/p20-an05.html

[himmelhauk]

Originally Posted by OldiesLover

Hummm... Do you mean you have an OCD (?): http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessi...lsive_disorder

As can be seen... Obsession is a mental disorder.


Also see: http://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topic...cd/index.shtml

And: http://www.mentalhealth.com/dis/p20-an05.html

I was always under the impression that OCD is when someone has a routine they follow just to feel comfortable like shutting a door 3 times or when even though I lock my car from the door when I get out, I still click the remote. I certainly have always had a passion for asian women though I'm not sure if it's an obsession.

All throughout school I had a lot of asian friends so that lead to my love of asian women. I always liked a lot of my girl friends though they went out with other asian dudes which sucked for me but oh well, what can you do? lol at least now I finally have the asian woman of my dreams

[townfrog]

A fetish becomes unhealthy when it becomes totally necessary for sexual arousal or performance. If some particular style of photo, type of woman or a particualr actual behavior is the only thing you can respond to with sexual feelings it is a problem. Otherwise a fetish is seldom harmful.
For me, one of the things which first attracted me to asian women on the internet was picture quality. No joke! When I first started searching for pictures of beautiful naked women on the internet I noticed many pictures of asian women showed greater care by the photographer for lighting, composition focus and color. Not that i was looking only for the sake of art! I love naked women! But western porn MOVIES tend to be better than asian (my opinion) asian still photographs tend to be better than western photographs. I found myself thinking, 'not only is this a beautiful, sexy woman, but a very good picture'.

[decoy_2099]

see oldie with my case i never had a tiime frame or a constant path to fallow, it happened when ever and where ever yes i had talked to shrinks about these kinda things and i was told when it comes to a person as long as it is not physical touching it in not ocd sense i dont always or only look at asians to get off or able to get off than in terms is a nother case of an addictive trait of an obsession as the dictionary states
1 Compulsive preoccupation with a fixed idea or an unwanted feeling or emotion, often accompanied by symptoms of anxiety.
2 A compulsive, often unreasonable idea or emotion.
now many might mistake an obsession as a fixation (the main cases of this trait)
3 Psychology. A strong attachment to a person or thing, especially such an attachment formed in childhood or infancy and manifested in immature or neurotic behavior that persists throughout life.

[OldiesLover]

I have long been fascinated by words, the concepts behind a specific word and the communication of these word concepts.

Candyman has picked two of my all time favorites, fetish and obsession. He has a separate thread for fetish, which is an interestin' discussion, and now obsession.

Use of the word Obsession, or being obsessed, started being used as discoveries were made about OCD's. As shown by my links, OCD's are quite common and range from fairly harmless to extremely distructive.

Marketing, such as with the perfume, Obsession, have successfully placed a sexy spin onto the word, which is still speading throughout the culture. They probably picked on Obsession because Fetish had too much blatent sexuality to it.

We must realize that words have concepts, and hence, interpretations behind them.

For example, Stubborn. We say, "He's too stubborn." However, we can also interprete a stubborn person as being persistent. Rarely do we say, "He's too persistent." This is because generally speaking, persistence is perceived as a positive, as with the related word; consistent.



Fetish and Obsession... Also have such concepts behind their usage.

[Candyman]

That's why you are so wise Oldman

I bet I would get a totally different reaction if I substituted the word obsession with the word passion for the name of this thread. Obsession sounds like I am borderline crazy, but passion has that sensual connotation to it and sounds less crazy.

When I also use color, it also adds to the effect.

And the word fetish wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't for its application of the word by people. As if something is wrong with you for being attracted to Asian women. It's not my fault god made them so hot.

And Asian women in America need to relax for a second and not assume that everyone is trying to get with them is only doing so based on ulterior motives. I can go anywhere else in the world and not deal with this silliness. But as long as I am here, I think I will have to keep in the back of my mind to watch what I say if I approached an Asian woman unless they approached me or got to know me beforehand.